Writing Wedding Vows

The thought of writing your wedding vows may be daunting, but it's not as difficult as it seems. Consider our tips below, and links to sample vows.

1. Make sure that everyone is in agreement with personlized vows. The officiants we use have fantastic ceremonies with or without customized vows. Discuss personalized vows with your future spouse. You want to be sure your fiance is comfortable with writing personal vows before you decide on it. Some religions require traditional wording, while others allow you to write your own if you include certain phrases.

2. Start simple. Time to answer a few questions. The following questions can help, even if you don't think the answers will turn up in your vows. It can help you brainstorm ideas. Take a break if you reach a point of writer's block; don't force. Try free-writing answers as they come to you; don't worry about editing at first.

• What is the greatest thing about the person you are going to marry?
•When did you know you were in love or going to marry this person?
•What does marriage mean to you? Why do you want to get married? • How will your relationship change by getting married? How will it stay the same?
•What is your favorite memory of your partner?
•Did you dream of your wedding day when you were little? How does that compare to what you are about to experience?

3. Look at samples. Check out ForeverWed.com for vow ideas and samples, or About.com to get started.

4. Bring it all together. Look at your answers you wrote earlier. Highlight phrases or words you feel are suitable. Choose the sentences and passages you like the best. Also, try looking at literature or movies and taking bits and pieces to tie into your own. Take a sentence or two from a book or movie, add in a few of your own words, and finish with a promise sentence: "I promise..." or "I vow...".

5. Or try just going simple.(Name of your fiance), you are my (best friend, life love, the one I want to spend the rest of my life with, etc.) On this day, I take you to be my (wife, husband, lawfully wedded wife or husband, life partner, etc.) I promise you that I will be (faithful, worthy of your trust, worthy of your love, your loving partner, etc.) I vow to (honor you, cherish you, love you, respect you, laugh with you, cry with you, support you in your goals, etc.), for (insert here the length of your vow, like for as long as we both shall live.) I look forward to our new life together as (partners, a couple, etc.).

6. Practice. Read your vows aloud to yourself or a pet. Look in the mirror, talk slowly. Try reading to a friend or family member who may be a good writer, or someone who is familiar with your relationship. Try to memorize what you can, but it's not a bad idea to have a note card for the ceremony. If nothing else, it will reassure you that you won't draw a blank.

Thanks to About.com for the useful wedding vow info!